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Gbeminiyi Ogunleye
2 months ago
Overview
‘Relationship Allowance’ Is a Bad Joke in Modern Dating
Nigerian dating has become a subscription service where ‘I love you’ is confirmed by bank alert. It’s clear our dating culture is sinking fast and the joke’s on us all.
Imagine you are a young man in Nigeria, trying to assemble a life that makes sense. You work, study, and steadily invest in yourself; not extravagantly, but just enough to stay afloat and remain functional. Money leaves your account for predictable reasons: transport, food, and rent. These comprise the basic costs of participation in modern life. Then you start dating, and you discover an expense for which you never budgeted.
Suddenly, affection comes with a price tag. A monthly expectation, quietly but firmly introduced, suggests that you must send money to your partner simply to keep the relationship stable. It is not for rent or for emergencies. It exists merely to maintain peace, loyalty, and emotional access. Miss a payment, and the tone shifts. She suddenly remembers it is best she ‘chooses herself,’ or she hits you with the classics: ‘It’s not you, it’s me,’ or ‘It’s not working, and I think I need space.’ Love, it turns out, has a billing cycle.
